This self-assessment questionnaire has been designed to help you assess your readiness to assume a leadership role in the company. A significant amount of research has gone into each of the questions detailed below. It is suggested that you consider the options carefully before you make a choice.
1. Are you willing to lie shamelessly to your colleagues and subordinates to save your skin in times of trouble for yourself or for the business ?
| Always | Mostly | Occasionally | Rarely | Never |
| | | | | |
2. How willing are you to keep changing your requirements without assigning any reason ?
| Always | Mostly | Occasionally | Rarely | Never |
| | | | | |
3. How would you rate yourself on your ability to give vague and misleading instructions
| Very high | High | Moderate | Low | Very low |
| | | | | |
4. When you see a colleague who has been considered, alongwith yourself, a contender for promotion to the next senior role, in trouble because he has failed to deliver on promised commitments and is under scrutiny from senior management, you will
| Feed rumours about his bad habits openly | Covertly spread rumours about him | Mind your own business | Mind your own business, but stop any unfair comments about him | Jump to his assistance |
| | | | | |
5. How long can you keep subordinates waiting for a meeting that you have called ?
| >2 hours | 1 – 2 hours | 30 – 60 mins | < 30 mins | Not at all |
| | | | | |
6. How often do you call a meeting of your subordinates that is urgent ?
| Daily | Once a week | Once a month | Once a year | Never |
| | | | | |
7. Would you have pangs of guilt if you had to sack an employee without assigning any reason whatsoever ?
| What does guilt mean ? | Rarely | Occasionally | Mostly | Always |
| | | | | |
8. How often will you ensure that employees work on their day off either because of your slip-up or without there being a need to do so ?
| Every week | Once a month | Once in 6 months | Once a year | Never |
| | | | | |
9. If you can break rules, without fear of being discovered, for a financial benefit to the company or to yourself, will you do it ?
| Always | Mostly | Occasionally | Rarely | Never |
| | | | | |
10. How often do you check your Blackberry for messages ?
| < 1 min | 1 – 2 mins | 2 – 3 mins | 3 – 5 mins | 5 mins |
| | | | | |
There is no answer-sheet for this questionnaire. None is required. As a future leader, you should by now be aware of the traits required for senior leadership. If, after answering this questionnaire you have assessed yourself to be ready, step forward and take a place at the leadership high-table. If your assessment was inaccurate, you will know when you are sacked unceremoniously.
darkofficehumour 
Qualifications to work for today’s megacorps and megabanks. They would astound even Machiavelli. The pension busting is cruelest of all. Lotta justifiable homicide due in my book.
Questions to be added :
1. How many times have you got the government to bail out your company on innocent taxpayer money ?
2. What percent of employees’ retiral funds have been used up and spent on your watch in pursuing a non-existent short-term chimera ?
Cynical! But so true!
Thanks for finding it cynical! Looks like my writing is able to convey what is on my mind 🙂
Very cool share! It’s amazing just what the corporate world has come to these days.
Thanks for visiting. Of course, the corporate world is the setting here, as I am familiar with it, but it could be seen as a metaphor for life in general.
Q: How many mistakes have you made thus far in your career?
A: None!
Q: Sorry, you don’t get the job.
A: Why? Because a man who makes no mistakes has not accomplished much.
Q: No, because you managed to cover it up so well and I have something better for you – how about president of a huge bank?
Ha ha ! That too. Many hidden qualities of leaders are tumbling out of the closet.
This reminds me of WAY too many places where I’ve worked. Great job!
Thank you. Glad you can identify with the situations.
Have a Super Sunday!
Thank you. You too !!
You have identified the basic criteria ; you can devise an Application Form for recruitment based on these. Nicely observed! Keep it up!
Glad you liked the post and thank you for the suggestion. Having said that, as a Manager, I have become totally incompetent to do any work, and hence, will delegate the task to a team-member so that I can then judge the output and feel superior.
This is great. You must have published it before I began following you. Hmmm…. What else have I missed?
Thanks Jacqui. Feels great to have an old post picked up and commented on. This is part of the original theme of the blog – corporate satire.
Linking another post from that time and theme here, which was the most commented and liked of all:
https://darkofficehumour.wordpress.com/2012/05/09/in-the-eyes-of-others/
Thanks again.