Who will the common man turn to for curing his incurable diseases brought on not by infection or bacteria or parasite, but on account of the afflicted having incurred divine wrath?

Where will thugs and goons, and others with low self-esteem, congregate and seek solace in each other’s company while carrying out their business?

Who will the politicians woo for putting in a good word for them to swing the popular vote of blind followers in their favour, without having to do any work?

Whose charitable trusts will wives of senior politicians patronise?

Where will religious followers stockpile firearms, petrol bombs, Molotov cocktails and acid bulbs for throwing on law-enforcement officials when they try to do their job?

What will happen to the illicit arms manufacturing industry? Will it impact the growth projections for the economy; as recently as yesterday OECD has projected a 6.6% growth rate for FY 2016?

Where will fanatical followers keep innocent women and children hostage for the protection of one individual?

Who will rich businessmen patronise with the unaccounted for part of their wealth in return for seeking favours with politicians?

Will law-enforcement officials now need to go back to the dark days of relying only on murder and rape cases to get recognition?

Who will the common man blame for mistreatment after having gone inside private property without being invited?

These, and many other, disturbing questions are the subject of hushed conversations all over the state since 9 PM last night when news of the arrest of the latest Godman to capture popular imagination, wafted in through invasive news channels who cannot seem to mind their own business even under physical danger, and reported on the week-long siege of the “ashram” (hermitage) by law-enforcement forces seeking arrest of the Godman, braving armed attacks by the private army of the “sant” (saint).

Being in the same state, barely 200 km from the hub of activity, the seismic tremors felt in Gurgaon are particularly strong. People are conscious that the world, as we have known it, may never be the same again.

But every dark cloud has a silver lining. Such is life.

Difficulty in comprehending the spoken word, inability to articulate a response, a fixed, vacant stare and low level of education being understood to be the primary qualifications for the role of Godman, shivers of hope are coursing through veins of the downtrodden in the state, who see an opportunity for a lucrative career in the space recently vacated. People need Godmen. Many, many of them. One of the important items in the Job Description of Godmen being indulgence in illegal activities, causing them to go out of circulation after a period of success, we need to have others always ready to step into the vacancy.

What they don’t know is that many of them will eventually get disqualified because the position also requires the additional qualities of a thick skin and the ability to act without remorse for personal gain. They may be forced to stick to their honest professions like electrical repairs, plumbing, gardening and cleaning. But then, such is life.

Our Godman claims he saw a vision of Kabir, the 15th century poet, mystic and sage. As we all know, in 2014, that is more than adequate reason for people to throng to him and make him wealthy beyond his known sources of income.

Since last night, there have been reports of visions being seen of Rahim, Surdas, Meera, Tulsidas and Ravidas by people across the state. Competition is heating up. And we are only talking 15th century poets, mystics and sages here, approximating to the period Kabir lived in, whose existence and work is backed by historical records. Step a little beyond history, into the vast mythological space (the line between history and mythology is always thin and constantly shifting), and we have a constellation of over six hundred million and one (remember we added Sachin Tendulkar a few years back) Gods and Goddesses to choose from. Our Gods and Goddesses are suddenly a busy lot, having to appear in visions of over a billion people. At one God to two people, it is a ratio stacked against the Gods. We need more.

As keeping women and children hostage and using your private army to battle law-enforcement agencies is a stressful activity at the best of times, immediately after arrest he was taken away for a medical checkup.

19 thoughts on “Godman

    • Though reports are still coming out, it appears he did have a lot of passion for collecting illicit arms, abusing the weak and taking the law into his own hands. You can’t get to where he got without passion 🙂

      • Anna, I am honoured that you considered me. However, without meaning any disrespect, I have to request to be de-considered as I am not in a position to fulfil the requirements of the nomination. I will, in any case, go over and look at the other sites nominated. Thank you once again.

  1. I am unaware of the particulars that springboard this piece—in your usual astute and well-written style—but the truths of it are probably familiar to us all….a conundrum about the passion and corruption of power…and the seemingly endless need in the human heart for godmen to worship…it makes me very weary…

    • I am sure you speak for a lot of people Cynthia. These events happen with a regularity that make them seem like a natural part of life. Barely is one charlatan put behind bars when another one crawls out of the woodwork, with an even larger army of blind worshippers. Barely is one Ponzi scheme nailed before another one pops up from totally unexpected quarters. It is wearisome.

  2. Heavy competition in this field.There is this another lady called Radhe Maa or something from Delhi I guess.See her video below.What’s cute is how all educated masses also end up up following such douchebags. Makes we weep on my career choice 😥

  3. Can this be real?
    I hear IIM Ahmedabad is converting its well-known PGDM (Post Graduate Diploma in Mgt) programme to PGDFG (Post Graduate Doctorate in Fake Godliness). Already sold out. Sudden drop in IIT_JEE test takers.
    Cool moves though…

  4. As I got into your essay I finally realized you were not talking about the latest protest in the USA. How common are the problems in the world when we can see each other in our posts yet we are on opposite sides of the world?

  5. The worrying thing is that this gets repeated over and over again. I wonder if there is a solution. At the very least, people need to take responsibility for their actions (of patronising the Godman in this case), and not start blaming someone else when it does not turn out as expected.

    • Oh yes if the god-man is exposed to be a fake the victim must take responsibility rather than go into a depression as often see. Whereas people whose lives have been transformed for the better spent considerable time and effort in researching and testing their prospective guru 🙂

  6. That’s absolutely fine, Ankur, I understand. Complying with all the requirements does take time, and, anyway, awards may not be everybody’s cup of tea. Thank you for letting me know in such a courteous way. All the best, Anna

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